Hello everyone! Yo Joe!… and welcome to the weekend!!! There was no screening for G.I. JOE so I had to take my daughter to see it first this morning. Also, I wasn’t able to get a screener for THE END OF THE LINE. Hopefully, I’ll get a chance to get out and see that, but being a single dad makes it hard to get out alot. Anyway, I saw 5 out of the six movies released this first weekend of August. First let’s talk about the studio films.

I’ve been waiting over twenty years for a live-action G.I. JOE movie, and now I got what I asked for. Actually… not really. This is G.I.: RISE OF COBRA.

There’s not much of a plot here, but neither did any of the episodes of the show. We get characters Duke and Ripcord delivering a dangerous warhead somewhere (just like the cartoon), but the Baroness attacks them. Just when the two soldiers are about to die, the G.I. Joe team comes to the rescue, including Scarlett, Snake Eyes, and General Hawk. Duke and Ripcord are recruited onto the team. The rest of the movie has the Joe’s fighting over the warheads with an evil business man named McCullen (soon to be Destro). There are some things from the show that I always wanted to see up on the big screen, the main one being Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow sword fighting. This happens a few times and those scenes are pretty cool. However, most of this movie just sucks. Yeah, I know it’s just supposed to be a dumb action movie with cool special effects. But even those looked cheap. Even in TRANSFORMERS 2, though the story sucked, the action was pretty cool. Not so much here. And what they do with the characters?!? Ugh!!! Channing Tatum as Duke is awful. I can never understand what the hell this guy is saying! Subtitles please! Marlon Wayons is dreadfully unfunny as the supposed comic relief, Ripcord. Christopher Eccleston was clearly the wrong choice for Destro. Just doesn’t seem right with a Scottish accent. Dennis Quaid is cheesy as Hawk, but it fits I suppose. The Baroness was disappointing. I wanted her to have a thick Russian accent as she says phrases like “Get this thing airborne!” Instead we get a superficially hot villain that seems like she was recruited while shopping on Rodeo drive in Beverly Hills. And what they do with her character is inexcusable. I did like Rachel Nichols as Scarlett and she has a pretty good fight with the Baroness in the first half. Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Cobra Commander is kind of laughable. It’s not really his fault, I think his voice was dubbed by someone else anyway. There was a pretty cool chase in the middle of the streets of Paris that has Snake Eyes on top of a car at high speed. But there’s just too much (bad) CG throughout the whole movie. I liked some of the underwater fortresses and stuff, but I wished they used more models. Director Stephen Sommers is talented enough to make a good movie (sorry everyone, I did like VAN HELSING) , but it seems like he was just on auto pilot here. The movie also reeks of studio interference. This is really sloppy! Lots of awkward edits and distracting ADR work all over the place here. As a G.I. Joe movie, it’s not very good. They get the Snake Eyes/Storm Shadow stuff right for the most part, but everything else sucks. It needed to be more like the show. For one, I hated the black costumes. I want bright colors, just like the cartoon. The designs for them were already done for the filmmakers, why did they have to spend lots of dough for costume designers to make new outfits, the work was already done. That’s needless spending as far as I’m concerned! Also, when vehicles explode I want to see parachute’s fly out of them. And everyone needs to yell “Yo Joe! or “Cobra!” Every five seconds. That’s the only way I’ll ever like a JOE film. But even as a dumb action film it fails. Fans will be disappointed unless they’re so desperate that they’ll like anything that says it’s a G.I. JOE movie. It’s not the worst movie out there and occasionally has neat moments, but the movie just feels too cheap to be a real good movie. Maybe see it with some buddies to make fun of it after you drink alot.

Next up we have JULIE & JULIA,

Nora Ephron’s latest. I haven’t really been a fan of hers. I think the only film I liked that she made was MICHAEL (nope, I never even thought SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE was any good). This one is based on two books. One is about Julia Childs (Meryl Streep) learning to cook, and the other originated as a blog written by Julie Powell (Amy Adams) who took it upon herself to cook every single one of Childs’ recipe from her book. The movie blends the two stories together, going back and forth between the two timelines. It’s not bad, in fact it’s quite harmless. I thought Amy Adams was terrific (isn’t she always?) as Julie and I really liked the relationship between her and her husband. This portion of the film drew me in and I enjoyed it. However, the Julia Childs story was a mixed bag and it’s mostly due to Streep’s performance. Now don’t get wrong, Streep is undeniably the finest actress of her generation and I love how fearless she is when she tackles a role. But more often than not I found her portrayal of the famous cook too much like a caricature. Sure, Childs was a unique character and had odd traits, but still, I felt some of Streep’s decisions felt more like a cartoon character than an actual person. There’s a scene in the movie when Julie is watching SNL and Dan Aykroyd is doing his famous Julia Childs impersonation and it’s not that much different than Streep’s version. Unfortunately, this took me out of the movie. I couldn’t quite get into it, but I did really like the Julie story line. Overall, I didn’t hate it and even liked it at times. If you’re not as critical going to the movies, you might enjoy it. Especially women over 50, who will think it’s the best film of the year. Not me though.

A PERFECT GETAWAY

is writer/director David Twohy’s 6th film. This is a guy who frustrates me. I’ve seen three of his movies before this one. Two were decent (THE ARRIVAL, PITCH BLACK) and one was too ambitious to be successful (CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK). I know he’s capable of making something truly great, but he usually screws up it in the end. His latest, I believe, contains some of his best work to date. The premise is simple: A newlywed couple (Steve Zahn & Milla Jovovich) go on a hiking trip in Hawaii. They find out that a murderous couple are on the loose nearby, but they still carry on. They meet two other couples, one of which they suspect are the criminals (Chris Hemsworth & Marley Shelton), while they partner with the other (Timothy Olyphant & Kiele Sanchez) on the long trek. But who are the real killers? It’s kind of like an Agatha Christie thing, a little. Actually, the first hour reminded me alot of DEATH PROOF. Nothing really happens, just alot of dialogue and getting to know the characters. Unlike most people, I LOVED DEATH PROOF! So I really enjoyed this part. It even reminded me a bit of last year’s TRANSSIBERIAN, which I loved! Since Zahn’s character is a screenwriter, there are lots of movie references and clever bits that have him and movie buff Olyphant talking about screenwriting techniques as they parallel what’s really happening. I loved the first hour of this movie. Zahn is great and it contains what I believe to be Jovovich’s best work to date. The set up is so good that it pains me to reveal that the last half hour falls apart. Once things are revealed, it becomes too silly. I don’t mind it when things stretch logic, but I hate it movie when a killer is finally revealed and then he/she totally changes personality for the rest of the film. Kind of like they’re saying, “That’s right! I’m the bad guy, so now I have to overact and be evil now”. I hate that. Twohy changes style in filmmaking as well by using annoying editing tricks like split-screens, freeze frames, and that stupid “Speed-up/Slow-Down” crap. Sometimes I don’t mind that stuff, but when the first half isn’t shot like that, be consistent. Just because the plot changes doesn’t mean that you have to change your style so much that it seems like another filmmaker took over. Despite the fact that Olyphant gives the performance of his career (I normally hate the tool, but he’s perfect here), I can’t quite recommend it. The first 2/3 was so good! Dammit! It’s not that I hated the reveal, I just hated the execution of it. Didn’t ruin the entire movie, but I can’t fully recommend it either.

Now for the independent films. Opening at the Lagoon this weekend is PAPER HEART.

It’s a mockumentary, but not in the way Christopher Guest’s movies (WAITING FOR GUFFMAN, BEST IN SHOW) are. No, this is a fake Doc that uses the medium to tell a romance. It stars comedienne Charlyne Yi as herself. She’s making a Documentary about love, by interviewing random people and couples on the street. Charlyne doesn’t believe in love, so she’s approaching the film with a negative attitude. While at a party, she meets actor Michael Cera (playing himself), and the two hit it off. Before she knows it, they’re kind of dating and she’s very smitten by him. But the director, Nicholas Jasenovec (Jake Johnson) , wants to film them all the time as he feels it’s important to the movie. This ends up putting a strain on Charlyne and Michael’s relationship. I LOVED this movie! The big reason for this is Charlyne Yi. The only thing I’ve seen her in before this was in KNOCKED UP (she was the pot head sitting on the couch). But she is so God Damn adorable and cute in this! Within the first 30 seconds, I immediately fell in love with her innocently shy and awkward persona. Just the way she asks questions and gets embarrassed by people’s answers. Her laugh is infectious, she makes the cutest faces and when she sings a song for Michael it gave me goose bumps. My heart was a flutter, and I now really hate Michael Cera (who is also dating her in real life ). Besides her, the movie is really good too. It does offer some great insight on love and relationships. I loved hearing stories from old couples who have been together, and seeing Charlyne react to them. She also does some cute Kindergarten-like puppetry to help tell those stories. It’s not all laughs though. Once the filmmakers intrude on Yi’s and Cera’s love life, it becomes a little sad. I cried a little. Now the screening I attended was missing the last two minutes, so I had to wait to watch a screener. Boy, am I glad I waited for it cause the ending is fantastic! It’s charming, adorable and hilarious at the same time. This is one of the best if not the best movie about love that has come out this year! I would even say it’s one of the best movies of the year. And it’s largely because of this summer’s greatest special effect, Charlyne Yi! My new celebrity crush. However, I could see people finding her annoying too. So I guess liking this movie may depend on what you think of her. I love her, so I say go see it now!!!

Lastly, I saw THE COVE.

It’s a powerful documentary that is about a group of activists trying to get footage of dolphins being slaughtered by Japanese fisherman, and expose them to the world. It starts off by introducing Richard O’Barry. He used to be Flipper’s trainer. That’s right! Flipper! From the TV show. O’Barry used to capture and train dolphins for the entertainment industry. He became very attached to the dolphins, and when one of the dolphin’s died in his arms, he decided he needed to free all the dolphins he could. Since then, he’s been arrested multiple times for freeing captive dolphins. His latest mission is to expose the operation in Japan. He teams up with some divers and filmmakers to hide some cameras in a secret cove where they slaughter the dolphins. What follows is a genuinely suspenseful thriller. O’Barry is a likable crusader and the cause is noble. I was really rooting for these heroes. They also do a great job showing how dolphins aren’t just dumb animals. They’re highly intelligent, self-aware beings. The film’s only downfall is a twenty minute chunk that is about a corrupt meeting involving whales and serving fish in schools. It’s interesting stuff, but not what the Doc was originally about. It didn’t really fit. But the ending is very effective. I’m astounded by the footage they were able to get. It’s extremely disturbing and will upset many viewers, but it gets the message across. This could have been the year’s best Documentary if it wasn’t for the meandering middle section. But it’s still rock solid and if you’re an activist, you’ll probably love it more than me.

Here is the recap for the weekend:
(based on a four star rating system)

G.I. JOE: RISE OF COBRA [PG -13] – **
JULIE & JULIA [PG -13] – **1/2
A PERFECT GETAWAY [R] – **1/2
PAPER HEART [PG -13] – ****
THE COVE [PG -13] – ***

So once again, it’s better to be at Uptown and Lagoon this weekend than spending money at the multiplex. G.I. JOE sucks. JULIE & JULIA was okay. A PERFECT GETAWAY started off awesomely, but has a rotten last act. THE COVE is a slightly unfocused but ultimately effective documentary about the safety of dolphins. And PAPER HEART is a tremendously sweet, quirky and funny comedy that examines love and relationships. This is the must see movie of the week and possibly the summer! Unfortunately, the Uptown art fair is this weekend which will make it more difficult to get to these theaters. But believe me, to see PAPER HEART, it’s worth the hassle!

Take care everyone! Be geeky and watch movies

Tags: A Perfect Getaway, Amy Adams, Dolphins, G.I. Joe, Geeks, Meryl Streep, Paper Heart, Snake Eyes, The Cove, Your Mom

This post was written by Austin Kennedy, Friday, August 7th, 2009 at 5:12 pm and is filed under Does It Hold Up?, Events, Headlines, Musings, Reviews. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.